Dark Armor

It was the dawn of the 21st century and Franklin’s Grand Experiment had failed. Thirteen selected patriots, collectively known as the “Republican Guardians”, descended into the labyrinth beneath the mall.

“These are dark days,” spoke the one they called The Newt. “We’ve sent all our heroes to their deaths and now we’ve no one left to protect our family values. The enemy has liberally used their majicks to ensnare the populace with their promises of gay love and net neutrality. We’ve placed into the history books a false prophesy, which we now act to fulfill. Our mission is to resurrect the greatest hero our country has ever known.” But something had gone wrong. Their revered Gipper stood before them renewed in body but his mind had been ravaged by some terrible, liberal disease.

“We’ve no choice,” lamented The Reverend. “When a monstrous perversion of American ideals is created it is our duty to protect our interests in the usual way: send it overseas!”